Unexpected
by Dreamsand Caster 2
Summary: A series of various oneshots on really random couples/subjects. Please don't flame just because you don't like the couple. R&R/F&F please! Also if you want me to turn the oneshot into another seperate story or continue it, please comment/PM me so! Disclaimer-I obviously don't own KFP, if I did...well...yeah.
1. Forbidden Pleasures -Shifu

Things Shifu Can Definately Not Do in the Jade Palace. Ever.

**A/N Hey! This is my first oneshot in this series. Please comment/PM me throughout the stories if you want me to continue the story/make it into a full story instead of just a oneshot.**

**Enjoy!**

The Oh-so-great Shifu, Grandmaster of the Jade Palace, may not do the following offences, even if he so wishes to;

1. Put his earphones on, with his stripy, bright pink legwarmers and dance around to 'Gongmen Style' (LOL: Diclaimer-I got 'gongmen style' from someone off of tumblr and thought it was brilliant) in the Training Hall. Or anywhere for that matter.

2. Kick any guy who even _looks_ at Tigress, right in his surprised ugly face.

3. Punch any guy who even _looks_ at Tigress, right in his surprised ugly face.

4. Wuxi-Finger hold any guy who even _looks_ at Tigress.

5. Hurt any guy that looks at Tigress, anywhere.

6. Knock Po down the stairs with his bamboo flute.

7. Cry over Master Oogway.

8. Have 'The Talk' with Tigress. Or _anybody_. That works.

9. Admit to Tigress that she is the most talented kung fu master ever.

10. Admit to anyone he still plays with his dolls. (Shifu: They're very delicate Action Figurines! Collectable Items!) _Okay...Defensive..._

11. Tell anyone that he was in love with Junjie... :l

12. Sing, 'Can't be Tamed' by Miley Cyus into his toothbrush, or the hairbrush that no-one knows he has that he uses to brush his beard and ponytail.

13. Tell everyone he still wears Peppa Pig knickers.

14. Admit that Po actually beat him in a sparring match.

15. Admit that he once washed his pits in the Pool of Sacred Tears.

16. Fart. FULL. STOP.

17. Burp. FULL. STOP.

18. Tell everyone that Tai Lung was actually a girl with some physical and mental problems. In other words, a girl with: facial hair, too much muscle, walks around without a shirt on, vocal issues.

19. Tell everyone when he was a cub, he accidentally dyed Junjie's tail purple to match his shirt.

20. Tell everyone that Mr Ping's soup has 'FatPonious'a disease which is contagious, and will make you as fat as Po if you eat the soup.

21. Imitate Po at dinner, saying: "Ohmygosh ohmygosh ohmygosh! Wow! Your the Furious Five! Can I have your autograph?! Can I tell you long stories?! Can I show you my collection of patatoes shaped like birds?!" while hopping from foot to foot, stuffing a pillow up his robe, and shovelling as many dumplings into his mouth as possible.

22. Admit that when they were young, Shifu, Junjie and Chao all wanted to be able to fly like Fenghuang. SO, they jumped down the stairs to the Jade Palace. And faceplanted into a tree. Much to the amusement, and concern, of Fenghuang.

23. Kill Po.

24. Get a glittery unicorn tatoo on his forehead. Or on any part of his body.

25. Use Viper as a skipping rope.

26. Go to the pub, and get drunk. Or just get drunk.

27. LOL.

28. Have children. As in, children that are related to him by blood...uh! You know what I mean.

29. Act like Po.

30. Eat like Po.

31. Sleep like Po.

32. Talk like Po.

33. Do anything like Po.

34. Grin.

35. Hug Tigress.

36. Kiss Tigress (like Father/Daughter)

37. Fly. As stated in Number 22. He does not have the ability to it into your head Shifu! (Shifu: :'( )

38. Understand teenagers.

39. Play frisbee with Crane's hat.

40. AND HE CAN NEVER, **EVER**, _**EVER**_, _**EVER...**_ Dance. Or sing. Or attempt at any musical arts whatsoever. Your eyes and ears would burn. You would think that with those big ears he would be able to hear how bad he was.

**A/N I got an insiration from BlackRaider, as she(?) wrote: A Tiger Masters Code, which is a list of 101 things Tigress cannot do. And people were saying how they'd like a Master Shifu one, so I did: 40 Things Shifu Must Never, Ever Do. **

** R&R/F&F Please! **

**Shadow x**


	2. A New Arrival

A New Arrival.

**Second oneshot. Enjoy!**

"Junjie!"

"Shifu!"

"Chao!" The three small masters were at it again. They were always playing this game. Always, it started off with one of them annoying another, which broke into an argument, which, in turn, transformed into a game, one they continuously played all the time, when they chased eachother around the courtyard. And always, it ended up on the ground laughing, arguments and disagreements long forgotten, much to the amusement of the Palace staff. They were very fond of 'the children'.

"Boys!" The three young teens snapped their heads towards Master Oogway, their attention grasped immediately, though he had spoken softly. They hopped to their feet, facing him, standing in a perfect line, up straight, and did a curt yet respectful bow, returning to their original positions, putting their hands behind their backs. In response, Oogway only chuckled. He found it funny the way they did that all the time. So disciplined.

"Master Lin is here, and she's brought a friend for you." The three smiled. Master Lin was so nice. She was Master Oogway's 'Lady Friend', which always made them snigger and smirk when they saw them talking to one another. Yet they were curious too, who was this mysterious 'friend' Oogway was speaking about? They had no choice but to follow him to find out.

Reaching the entrance to the Palace, they instantly saw Master Lin, who was also a turtle. How ironic. She was wearing a bright lilac sash with a silver trim that hung loosely over her shoulder, which made her look about 30 years younger, so around 1205. Smiling she sweeped them all into a tight hug, something you wouldn't expect a kung fu master to do, mush less from an ancient turtle, but they were used to it by now, so they returned it gladly. She was always nice and warm, and they were cold from running about in the chilled autumn air.

Releasing them all from the embrace, Lin smiled kindly at them, her eyes lighting up as she spoke. "I'm assuming Oogway told all of you young boys about the surprise visitor I have for you?" They all nodded, while she playfully glared, half-heartedly, at Oogway, who looked away innocently.

"Well then my dears, this, is my dear student Fenghuang, from my academy." She moved aside, gestering to a small owl, she was quite pretty. She had a purple top, with gold trim, a red kind of skirt underneath, with a black sash around her middle, and violet eyes that shone in the light to match. Her feathers were a dark grey, speckled with black and interesting markings, and a lighter area around her face, making it stand out. Her wings were an ebony black.

"Hello," she said gently. "I'm Fenghuang, nice to meet you." She bowed, and they stood and stared, resisting the urge to wolf-whistle. Fenghuang on the other hand, was resisting the urge to raise an eyebrow.

"H-hi. I-I'm Chao. N-nice to m-meet you," Chao stuttered, awkwardly bowing back. She smiled at him, making him glow on the inside. As you have probably noticed readers, Junjie, Shifu and Chao had never actually had a conversation with a _girl _before. I think Fenghuang sensed this, and decided to have some fun.

She fluttered her eyelashes at the boys, smiling. Junjie's glasses almost popped of the end of his nose. Well actually they did, but he was quick to catch them before the reached the ground, perching them back on the tip of his muzzle.

"Quick reflexes," Fenghuang commented, silently noting that in her head, incase she were to play a prank on them later.

"T-Thanks," Junjie blushed. You could even see it through his orange fur. Fenghuang was having a hard time not laughing. These guys were so adorable. And they would be fun to mess with.

She turned to Shifu, who hadn't said a word since she came. Cocking her head to one side she looked at him, blue eyes meeting purple.

"So...What are your names? I already know Chao's."

"Junjie, and this is Shifu. It's a pleasure to meet you." Junjie bowed masterfully. Fenghuang returned it, though she could sense that he was still incredibly nervous. Smiling, she turned back to Shifu, who looked at her in a bored way.

"Shifu," he droned.

"Yeah, Junjie told me."

...

There was an awkward silence.

...

"So, boys, would you like to show Fenghuang the training hall and the Hall of Warriors? Give her a tour maybe?" Oogway prompted gently.

"Sure. Follow us." Chao said, making a motion with his right hand. She happily obliged, immediately following after him, keen to see the famous Jade Palace. Walking along side Junjie, who smiled shyly at her, she glanced back at Shifu.

"Aren't you coming, Shifu?"

Rolling his eyes, he, reluctantly, followed the others, not attempting to hide it.

_I don't think he likes me very much. I'll have to change that,_ Fenghuang smirked.

**A/N Well, here's my second oneshot! Hope you liked it...**

**R&R/F&F please!**

**Shadow x**


	3. Forbidden Love

A pair of scurrying feet echoed in the wide corridor. Crashes and growls could be heard coming from the training hall. It was three o'clock in the morning.

Junjie tried. He tried so hard. Yet, he could never seem to get it right. The Flaming Triple Side-Kick was an advanced move, even Chao had not yet mastered the secret. But Junjie was determined. He had never focused on anything more in his life. For once, he wanted to be the first to be able to do a move, one the others couldn't do. He had only seen it once, so he wasn't exactly expected to be able to do it, in fact, they would be amazed if anyone could, but he wanted to do it. He _needed _to do it.

Mustering up all the chi, and concentration, he had left, he took a deep breath, and started.

He guided his right paw gently along the floor in front of him and brought it behind his left paw. Making a soothing sweeping motion with his hands, a glistening golden orb was forming between them, and electricity shot up his arm. He brought his hands up to surround the golden ball, just a few millimetres away from touching it. Keeping eye contact with the ball, he threw his arms back and brought them forward with such a force that it knocked the orb flying towards the adversary. Junjie did three back flips, and landed in a strong stance, despite all the energy this was draining from him, with his hands held at the ready and his right foot behind his left. The ball bounced off the wall, as though by an invisible sheild it had been repelled, and came thundering back right towards Junjie at top speed, though at the last minute, he spun and side-kicked the orb, sending it back to the adversary, hitting it so hard that it made a large gaping hole in the wall, that looked as though it was about to suck him through.

Slumping to the floor, exhausted beyond belief, yet filled to the brim with triumph, Junjie sank wearily to his knees, and was dragged into darkness by the power of the Sandman.

Shifu was woken with a sudden start. His eyes shot open, and he bolted upright in his bed. He jumped off of his bedroll and hurried out of the room to the training hall, the place from which he heard the noise.

Opening the door a crack, he peeked in. He could only see all the usual equipment. He Shifu opened the door bit more, it creaking slightly. And that's when he caught sight of the unconsious Junjie. He shoved the door open all the way, and strided (as much as he could) towards the fox knelt down beside him. Lifting Junjie's head up in his hands, and putting it on his lap, he started to check his pulse etc. Then he turned and noticed the large hole in the wall, and the torn adversary lying in a heap on the other side. _Impressive buddy _Shifu nodded to himself in approval and awe.

At that moment, Junjie's fiery orange eyes were open, and were gazing up at Shifu, obviously confused. Shifu felt a little awkward, what with his head being on his lap and all. But strangely, and disturbingly, he kind of liked it... Looking into Junjie's glowing orbs, he felt something he had never felt before...

Junjie felt even more uncomfortable than Shifu. He was puzzled to say the least. Getting up from Shifu's lap, he stood, a little insteadily at first, on his feet. Turning to Shifu, he saw the red panda making a follow me motion with his hand. Obliging, he and Shifu walked side-by-side to the kitchen, and silently made two cups of tea. Passing one to Shifu, who was sitting at the table and took the mug gratefully, he himself remained standing, and .leant against the counter top with his tea in hand.

"So, you mastered the Flaming Triple Side-Kick then?" Shifu smiled at his friend.

Junjie grinned making Shifu's heart flutter. He couldn't think what it could be though... "Yeah! But I think I need to pay Master Oogway for a new wall..."

Shifu smiled again. "Don't forget a new adversary as well!"

Junjie groaned, taking a sip of his tea. "Hey, do you want any whipped cream?" Junjie randomly asked.

"Er...nah, I'm good thanks."

"Okay. More for me then!" Junjie said, picking up the can of cream and spraying it into his mouth, getting some on his lip. Shifu chuckled. It looked as if he had a mustache!

Junjie turned to his friend, confused. "What?" he asked. "Do I have something on my face?" For Shifu the opportunity was too good to resist. He abruptly got up from his seat and marched over to where Junjie was standing. And kissed him. On the lips.

Junjie's first thought was 'WTF' but then he warmed up to it, and started kissing back. Shifu was pushing Junjie harder and harder against the counter, but Junjie didn't mind one bit. He wrapped his arms around Shifu's neck, as Shifu had his arms around his waist, pulling them closer to one another.

Little did they know, that Chao and Fenghuang had heard them talking and had got up to see what the commotion was, and were standing together at the doorway, staring at them mouths (and beaks) agape.

Shifu and Junjie stopped making out for a second, and turned to look at them. They instantly pulled away from eachother, and the situation was really awkward.

"So..." Chao started. "You two are...a couple...now?" Fenghuang finished.

"ABOUT TIME!" They both yelled.

**Okay, I know that, that was probably one of the weirdest and crappiest stories ever, but hey, I had fun writing it, even though I myself find it weird. LOL **

**R&R/F&F please? I actually really like this pairing and nobody has done it before, so...sorry I you do too and I completely ruined it. I promise if I make a longer story about it I will make it better!**

**Shadow x**


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